Okay, so much for framing with baseball jargon. If I get too far into “framing,” I’m liable to stumble into mathematics, a field in which I’m a dismal failure and where — even in my sunset years — I fear to tread.
The simple act of perusing bank statements can cause irregular heart palpitations and/or stomach-churning. Still, three current observations concern baseball and near misses in life that — in some cases — may elicit laughter, and the decision to take one more swing.
One vignette is provided by a sprightly lady named Ruth Swinyar. At age 103, she is a super star at Fleurdley’s Assisted Living, where her son Dan, daughter-in-law Rose, and grandson D. J. are in charge. It’s in a serene rural setting a half-dozen miles off Interstate 35-W, on the southern edge of Fort Worth. She enjoys the outdoors, taking walks, smelling flowers, and hearing the bleats of goats as gentle breezes ruffle the trees. A happy conversationalist, she’ll take on just about any topic, but wisely “stops on a dime” when she senses threats from the jungle of technology that can engulf without warning.
There’s one new “thingie” that she’s proud to own, though. She was recently gifted with a new telephone featuring big square buttons that show pictures — not numbers. With the push of a button, she can summon kin, friends and uh, sometimes first responders.
One button that seems to be most readily at hand alerts 9-1-1 emergency personnel. It has been pushed several times, purely accidentally and never by intent.
On each occasion, first responders have “come a-runnin,” eager to be of assistance.
In fact, she now knows some of them on a first-name basis, thus warranting invitations to her 103rd birthday party — and some attended!
Oh, well. Give her credit for trying to complete calls, even if she sometimes hits the wrong button. This is but one minor example of life’s foul balls, but “Miss Ruth” is still at bat. A good time was had by all, and how often can first responders have their cake and eat it, too?
A second account concerns my friend Dee’Na Marquez, a wife and mother of two sons — Nicholas, 17, and Julian, 11. With fierce determination, she’s lost 60 pounds in 20 months through diet and exercise. Now that’s a home run, health-wise. Her life is well-ordered, and she teaches exercise classes several times each week.
Much is right in her life, but she’s a bit miffed some days by a barking dog next-door that refuses to play the “quiet game.” She mentioned her plight to a police officer who offered practical advice: “Dab some peanut putter on the chain link fence.”
She did, and is now able to buy a few hours of peaceful bliss while the dog licks away at the final smidgen of peanut butter. I don’t know if she uses smooth or crunchy, but whatever it is, the dog is busied, and Dee’Na gets her naps. Isn’t this pretty close to a home run?
The third vignette really concerns curve balls, and our granddaughter Addison is confidently at bat.
She opened a birthday card from her baseball-playing boyfriend, who is one school year behind her at a nearby high school. At her recent 18th birthday/graduation party, she read it: “As of today, you are dating a minor.”
A gifted and respected pitcher, he’s a clever guy whose “curve ball message” isn’t surprising. My guess? She’ll handle the pitch well, filing the card away among high school memory dreams. She’ll be careful not to mistakenly drop it into her Texas Rangers’ nightmare file. That’s where the hot-and-cold baseball team goes to die.
Dr. Newbury, a longtime speaker, may be contacted at 817-447-3872 or newbury@speakerdoc.com. At website www.speakerdoc.com, he reads his columns aloud, sometimes without stumbling.
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